Archive for February, 2015

Burp

Just burped the word ‘Bored’ rather loudly on what I’d assumed was my empty bus. Then a little old lady rang the bell to get off. She didn’t say anything.

Selfish

Nothing remotely funny about this one…

Here’s a word-by-word recounting of a genuine conversation I had with a middle-aged Eastern European woman today, a mere 18 hours after the horrendous accident on Lansdown Lane that made national headlines

I’d just parked up at the RUH:

EEW: Are you going to Weston?
Me: No, they’ve closed the high street for a memorial for yesterday
EEW: Are there any buses going to Weston?
Me: Not right now. As I just said…
EEW: (incredulously) You mean I’ll have to walk?
Me: (equally incredulously) Several people died yesterday. Maybe you should suck it up?
EEW: Listen…
Me: Shut up
EEW: I…
Me: Get away from me

Just unbelievable

Ghost

A little old lady is peering through the glass doors of the bay in which I’m parked. After enduring about five minutes of her squinting right at me I start to get annoyed, so I get out of the bus to see what she wants

LOL: (As the doors open and I spring out) Oooh! Ooh, I didn’t see you; the glass is all shiny. I thought you were a ghost driver!
Me: Boo